Bathroom remodel modesto ca
Whenever you have a new admit do you always check and go through their belongings or no?
2023.06.02 06:08 gumdrop00 Whenever you have a new admit do you always check and go through their belongings or no?
Ive been a CNA for over two years and most of that time was working in CA (1 SNF, 2 diff hospitals) and I remember the nurses I was working with going through all the pt's belongings and writing down whatever they have (or at least whats really valuable) to see if they had anything that could harm themselves or others, or if they carried something that was really high valuable and needed to be placed in a lock. I moved to AZ (not saying where in AZ) but at least where I work at, we've had patient's that have apparently overdosed in their bathroom. Another guy we had brought out his pocket knife and just left it on his bedside table. He wasnt aggressive but when I went in to give a treatment I had to ask where he got that from and he said "Oh it was in my bag". I had to ask a coworker of mine if the nurses here check belongings here and she said no because that's an invasion of privacy.
Is this like a state by state thing or difference in hospital policy thing?
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2023.06.02 05:58 hillcountrydbusa Revitalize Your Bathroom Space with Skilled Contractors in Colorado Springs
2023.06.02 04:08 jamesfidel2998 I just told my mother she is running in circles and insane
Background context: My single mom was never good financially, and always leaned on my grandparents to get by. We lived with them till I was in 8th grade, when they bought us a trailer to put on their property. Wasn’t much, but it was a roof over our heads and a place for both of us to get some privacy.
Years have gone by and I’m now 21 and she is 52. She always told me she didn’t want our house to look like an episode of Hoarding, but for over the past few years, we both fell into depressions and let ourselves go at different times. When we moved into the house we cleaned it up, like I said it wasn’t much, and had a lot of problems to begin with. There were holes in the walls and soft spots in the floor, and we made plans to fix it all. We had spent one summer putting new flooring in on one side of the trailer to remodel my room and bathroom, but after the initial patching of floor we just stopped.
It got to the point that she realized there was to much for her to pay for and work on and felt like she shouldn’t fall back on my grandparents.
Fast forward, and she had lost her job and stayed unemployed for months. I feel like this is when the worst started. I’m not saying I didn’t contribute to it, but I was a teenager and didn’t want to do anything I was told. So when she would ask to clean something, I would half-ass it or not do it and make up an excuse. Then she started working a job she hated and wasn’t able to be cleaning 24/7.
So she would “sleep in” on off days. ( where she would sleep 20 hours straight be up for maybe 4 hours and repeat till the weekend was over). As a teenager who just wanted to stay in my room and watch tv or play video games I took that to my advantage and formed really bad habits. But now after high school and never bringing any friends over or girls because I was embarrassed of how I lived I decided I would try to do better.
I still fall into habits but I’m trying, but when I complain that things need to get done and she shouldn’t sleep all day when the house looks like shit. It’s the same “when I asked for help years ago and you never did it, I’ve given up” and it’s actually gotten to me.
I know I wasn’t there to help but I was a stupid teenager, for Christ sake. We just got into a shouting match and the words lazy were thrown around by the both of us. Me saying “you’re a grown woman with a grown son and won’t clean your house because when I was a teenager I didn’t clean as much as you” and her saying “you should have been cleaning the house since you were 13”.
Over the past couple of months I’ve found out that my grandfather has been paying our power bill for months on top of trying to help us fix the house and vehicles and other things. She always told me we shouldn’t be asking them for money because they have done so much for us already, so hearing how he has spent thousands while she buys thing for the both of us we never needed, while also not letting them actually help us with our problems really got under my skin.
Tonight I told her one I am financially able I’m leaving, she can either help me clean both of our mess up together or I’ll just leave. She asked if she had done something wrong and I said you could probably have been more assertive with me while in early life, and then she asked if she was just forced to run in circles for everyone or if she is just insane. I said probably both. Because you have been doing the same shit for years and still expecting everything to work out fine in the end.
I know this is barely coherent but I’m pissed of and it helps me to just scramble thoughts down.
To be clear: I know this is not just her problem but as the adult and provider in this relationship I think my point is valid, (if your child is being a dick be assertive with them don’t just say fuck it, and give up on doing anything other than work and sleep) And I completely understand her point of I could have done more, but right now is what I’m worrying about and I’m trying to set a good start for myself as an independent person and at least know I help with basic bills and cleaning around the house without feeling like I’m the only one who gives a fuck.
Sorry again for rambling but this was cathartic and helped calm me down.
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2023.06.02 03:57 Mythos714 Transdev Strike San Diego
Labor Family,
Transdev workers represented by Teamsters Local 683 have been walking the line since May 16th for basic human needs! The right to clean, sanitary bathrooms along their routes and a safe place to take a break should not be a question, yet these workers who provide transportation services for the San Diego Metropolitan Transit System (MTS) are on an Unfair Labor Practice Strike because Transdev refuses to address these conditions. Transdev refuses to negotiate in good faith and has made false statements to the media regarding the status of negotiations. Local 683 is ready to get back to the negotiating table, work out these issues, and secure their members the best contract possible.
We need you help to support these working families while they fight for a fair contract! Please donate to their strike fund if you are able and please share the fund to your networks. Let’s show these workers the power of Labor Solidarity!
Visit
https://givebutter.com/683strike or text 683strike to 53-555 for a link to donate!
In Solidarity,
Your Labor Council
P: (619) 228-8101 E:
[email protected] 3737 Camino Del Rio South Suite #403 San Diego, CA. 92108
www.unionyes.org San Diego & Imperial Counties Labor Council CONFIDENTIALITY NOTICE: This electronic transmission and any documents attached hereto, contains or may contain confidential, proprietary and/or privileged information. The information is solely for use by the intended recipient. If you are not the intended recipient, please immediately notify the sender and delete the electronic transmission (including any attached documents) and all copies thereof. Any unauthorized disclosure, copying, distribution, or use is strictly prohibited.
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2023.06.02 03:22 therearenounsednames This quote seems high?
This is a quote to finish some drywall in my basement. The drywall is already hung- this is to finish it out only. Also, this is labor only , I would need to supply the mud, tape, and corners. Am I just being cheap? Atlanta area.
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2023.06.02 03:16 taylorsver university court lease takeover
1 Bed 1 Bath - Apartment 515 Sycamore Ln, Davis, CA 95616-3422, United States University Court Lease Takeover! Hi everyone, I need someone to urgently take over my lease. This is a 1 bed, 1 bath, not furnished except main things such as: fridge, microwave, closet, bathroom, etc. up to 3 occupants are allowed to live here. rent was originally $2150, but I'm willing to pay $500 in rent be I just want it off my hands. first month + security paid off. please message me if interested!
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2023.06.02 03:08 JJiaMM Off-campus housing 5 MINUTES FROM UCF
11614 Shilpa Ct, Orlando, FL 32817
2/2 Duplex townhouse for rent near UCF, fresh walls, newly remodeled kitchen, and bathrooms; close to UCF, Research Park, Waterford Lake Shopping Center, 417 and 408. Large living room, full-size washedryer hookups. Tenants are responsible for utility, cable, internet, and lawn care. No pets, good credit. $1,849
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2023.06.02 02:59 Choice_Ad_1267 The gray man: paranormal activity or sleep paralysis?
To preface: This story takes place in a small resort town in Minnesota. I have experienced countless paranormal events in my short lifetime (F, 26) … All of which took place in this town/surrounding areas. My fiancé, Austin (M, 28) had never experienced paranormal/ghosts ever in his life, until I brought him to meet my family in Minnesota in what I call their “haunted mansion” in this very town.
My parent’s home was a large residence on a lake in Minnesota. At 6,647 sqft. this was a big and beautiful home. One of the cool and notable parts of this house was that on the second story, there was a little nook at the top of the stairs. It looked like a regular & cozy nook, a bookshelf on each side of the walls & a rocking chair in between. (This will be important for the story later) the cool part about this nook was that the bookshelf on the right side wall actually opened up into a whole other living space. You’d simply push onto the wall and it would open up to a hidden living area, bathroom, bedroom & access to the outside.
I stayed there for a whole summer before I moved out to California when I was 17, and I don’t think I got a full nights sleep for the entire summer.
Every night I would be stuck in this petrifying state whenever it was nightfall and time for me to be alone in my room. I would lay awake at night RESTLESS, I would hear noises around me, see shadows all over my ceiling and walls of what I can only describe as ‘demonic’ or just overall creepy figures/people/ghosts? Shadows. The ‘shadow people’. And they loved to torment me. The most unnerving part of these sleepless nights wasn’t the sounds or the visuals, but the feeling -a paralyzing fear would wash over me, night after night. It felt like a physical presence in the air, it was heavier than reality and much darker, suffocating. True, petrifying horror, all around me.
I chalked it up to sleep paralysis- because that was the only way I could justify these horrors night after night. Though.. I was never fully asleep when these chilling events would occur… It’s safe to say sleep wasn’t something I got much of in the “haunted mansion”.
It wasn’t until I brought my fiancé to visit the family home, and he had a similar experience as me, that I really believed the residence could be truly haunted.
Me and the fiancé were enjoying our time in Minnesota (if you haven’t visited, Minnesota is paradise in the summer- 75 and sunny, gorgeous summer storms, all the good vibes).
I had been living in California for 6 years now, and while I was a little nervous to revisit the haunted mansion, I had my fiancé with me now, and many years had passed- (i should note also that I hadn’t experienced any of the “sleep paralysis” since moving out).
The first night there, we went to sleep and all was well. (I was very relieved).
However on night 2, the spooky presence came back to haunt us.
I woke up around 2 a.m. very thirsty. Our room was on the second story of the house, so getting up for a glass of water meant walking down the hall, passed the creepy bookshelf corner, down the stairs and into the kitchen.
I was feeling confident and brave since the first night at the mansion and the past 6 years, I hadn’t felt that evil paranormal presence… So I decided to let my fiancé sleep and venture out into the dark mansion alone.
I wandered down the dark hallway, but upon reaching the bookcase nook I was stopped in my tracks, as the rocking chair between the bookcases was rocking methodically, as if someone was in it. I immediately NOPED out, and headed straight back down the hall, into the bedroom where we were staying.
Without telling my fiancé about the creepy rocking rocking chair, I nudged him awake and asked him if he could go get me a glass of water. I didn’t bother telling him about the rocking chair, because at this point I really believed it was all in my head, and I was simply paranoid and maybe a little crazy.
Being the amazing & loving man he is, he groggily got out of bed, went down, & retuned with a glass of water (unscathed).
We both went back to sleep.
Shortly after going back to sleep, Austin was randomly awake again. He woke up, sat up, and turned his eyes to the door in front of our bed.
He says the moonlight was shining into our room, giving a soft blue hue, so his eyes didn’t need to adjust from awaking suddenly from his dead sleep. He took full account of the empty room before he lowered his head and body back down to rest on the pillow. However, as if the bed was a thin veil between the waking world and the dream realm, he slipped through and was sitting upright in bed again.
This time, in this dream state, he could see the light was on underneath the doorway to the hall. He could hear faint footsteps reaching the top of the stairs on the other side of the door.
Once again, as he fell back to the bed, he swung through into his awakened state and saw that the room was back to normal with a dark doorway.
In the back of his mind he knew that he was dreaming, but was unable to control when he slipped back into his dream. He was only able to recognize when he was truly awake. With each consecutive fall, the footsteps in the lit hallway drew closer.
As he traveled back and forth in between the planes, the pace quickened and the footsteps became louder.
Soon the footsteps reached the door to the bedroom and the entity on the other side began to slowly open the door. Falling to the bed and in between dreaming and reality happened faster and faster- until it was almost like the flash of strobe light between being awake in the empty room, and watching the door creep open in the dream. In the doorway stood a gray staticky figure.
It was like a shadow of a man standing before him. A dark gray looming figure, with a head and shoulders that tapered down to the bottom of the now open and lit doorway.
The gray man stood at the lit doorway, but did not enter. His blank face stared into the room where we slept, almost as if to make its presence known.
Austin woke for a final time, and it was morning, the door was closed, and the man was gone.
He woke me up and told me of scary dream/reality he experienced. I had never told him about the horrors I experienced in the mansion prior, but I opened up to him about all of it after hearing his experience. After all was out in the air, we both genuinely believe a dark presence haunts the mansion. My family has since moved out, so thankfully we won’t be visiting that residence again.
Because it happened to us both… we believe it may be more than a sleep paralysis coincidence… But what do you think?
P.s. if Morgan from THT is reading this…. Me and Austin were both just re-listening to episode 37 where you, Lauren & Alejandra talk about your paranormal and creepy experiences in MN. Being a MN girl who also moved to CA, I really relate to you all, and think it’s interesting we all had creepy stuff happen while in the land of 10,000 lakes. Would love to discuss this further with you if you ever do another creepy Ep!
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2023.06.02 02:52 Lost_inthot Water damage?
Hello Tile world. I made a recent post about an original 1950s bathroom I have - thank you to everyone who took time to educate me. After getting a little overwhelmed with the prospect of the demolition required for an appropriate remodel, I’m wondering if I should leave it as is.
This leads me to a (probably silly) question… is there any way to tell if there’s water damage under an original shower other than a gut? Other than water stains on the ceiling my toilet falling into my living room or whatever.
Thanks 🙏
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Lost_inthot to
Tile [link] [comments]
2023.06.02 01:26 Mythos714 Transdev Strike San Diego
| Labor Family, Transdev workers represented by Teamsters Local 683 have been walking the line since May 16th for basic human needs! The right to clean, sanitary bathrooms along their routes and a safe place to take a break should not be a question, yet these workers who provide transportation services for the San Diego Metropolitan Transit System (MTS) are on an Unfair Labor Practice Strike because Transdev refuses to address these conditions. Transdev refuses to negotiate in good faith and has made false statements to the media regarding the status of negotiations. Local 683 is ready to get back to the negotiating table, work out these issues, and secure their members the best contract possible. We need you help to support these working families while they fight for a fair contract! Please donate to their strike fund if you are able and please share the fund to your networks. Let’s show these workers the power of Labor Solidarity! Visit https://givebutter.com/683strike or text 683strike to 53-555 for a link to donate! In Solidarity, Your Labor Council P: (619) 228-8101 E: [email protected] 3737 Camino Del Rio South Suite #403 San Diego, CA. 92108 www.unionyes.org San Diego & Imperial Counties Labor Council CONFIDENTIALITY NOTICE: This electronic transmission and any documents attached hereto, contains or may contain confidential, proprietary and/or privileged information. The information is solely for use by the intended recipient. If you are not the intended recipient, please immediately notify the sender and delete the electronic transmission (including any attached documents) and all copies thereof. Any unauthorized disclosure, copying, distribution, or use is strictly prohibited. submitted by Mythos714 to Labour [link] [comments] |
2023.06.02 01:25 Mythos714 Transdev Strike San Diego
Labor Family,
Transdev workers represented by Teamsters Local 683 have been walking the line since May 16th for basic human needs! The right to clean, sanitary bathrooms along their routes and a safe place to take a break should not be a question, yet these workers who provide transportation services for the San Diego Metropolitan Transit System (MTS) are on an Unfair Labor Practice Strike because Transdev refuses to address these conditions. Transdev refuses to negotiate in good faith and has made false statements to the media regarding the status of negotiations. Local 683 is ready to get back to the negotiating table, work out these issues, and secure their members the best contract possible.
We need you help to support these working families while they fight for a fair contract! Please donate to their strike fund if you are able and please share the fund to your networks. Let’s show these workers the power of Labor Solidarity!
Visit
https://givebutter.com/683strike or text 683strike to 53-555 for a link to donate!
In Solidarity,
Your Labor Council
P: (619) 228-8101 E:
[email protected] 3737 Camino Del Rio South Suite #403 San Diego, CA. 92108
www.unionyes.org San Diego & Imperial Counties Labor Council CONFIDENTIALITY NOTICE: This electronic transmission and any documents attached hereto, contains or may contain confidential, proprietary and/or privileged information. The information is solely for use by the intended recipient. If you are not the intended recipient, please immediately notify the sender and delete the electronic transmission (including any attached documents) and all copies thereof. Any unauthorized disclosure, copying, distribution, or use is strictly prohibited.
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2023.06.02 01:21 Mythos714 Transdev Strike San Diego.
| Labor Family, Transdev workers represented by Teamsters Local 683 have been walking the line since May 16th for basic human needs! The right to clean, sanitary bathrooms along their routes and a safe place to take a break should not be a question, yet these workers who provide transportation services for the San Diego Metropolitan Transit System (MTS) are on an Unfair Labor Practice Strike because Transdev refuses to address these conditions. Transdev refuses to negotiate in good faith and has made false statements to the media regarding the status of negotiations. Local 683 is ready to get back to the negotiating table, work out these issues, and secure their members the best contract possible. We need you help to support these working families while they fight for a fair contract! Please donate to their strike fund if you are able and please share the fund to your networks. Let’s show these workers the power of Labor Solidarity! Visit https://givebutter.com/683strike or text 683strike to 53-555 for a link to donate! In Solidarity, Your Labor Council P: (619) 228-8101 E: [email protected] 3737 Camino Del Rio South Suite #403 San Diego, CA. 92108 www.unionyes.org San Diego & Imperial Counties Labor Council CONFIDENTIALITY NOTICE: This electronic transmission and any documents attached hereto, contains or may contain confidential, proprietary and/or privileged information. The information is solely for use by the intended recipient. If you are not the intended recipient, please immediately notify the sender and delete the electronic transmission (including any attached documents) and all copies thereof. Any unauthorized disclosure, copying, distribution, or use is strictly prohibited. submitted by Mythos714 to BusDrivers [link] [comments] |
2023.06.02 00:34 dont_know_how- Any ideas on how to remove?
| So my gfs mom is starting a bathroom remodel. Looks like shes using this to clean up the plywood. Any ideas on best way to remove? submitted by dont_know_how- to howto [link] [comments] |
2023.06.02 00:19 FollowThePostcard Advice: DIY Homeowners— Don't Pull a Permit
Failing a shower pan by .5 an inch is a huge bummer. Doubly so when they then fail you for a sink that does not have a UPC code. You're better off going alone if your remodel is a small bathroom or kitchen remodel.
The letter of the law outweighs the spirit of the law in the eyes of most* inspectors. I do feel the laws are important to protect against slumlords and for them to point to if your idea of electrical work is an extension cord draped through your studs, but holy smokes, I've now lost over 2k and a month of my time trying my best to meet the code, and it feels so damn shitty.
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2023.06.01 23:39 LittleP13 Is buying too small a bad idea?
I have a unique opportunity to buy a very small 1-bedroom in a highly desirable hillside area in LA. Some issues with the property include: needs a kitchen, bathroom and floor remodel and a new roof, plus landscaping eventually. It is priced around $500k and every other property in the area is minimum $800k in bad condition, but too small for us. My brother stays with us for 4 months out of the year and there is no place for a second bedroom. Plus, I may want to have children of my own in the next year. Another issue is that the house has no street frontage. You must climb three sets of city-owned stairs to reach it. Is it a smart move to buy it and suffer in a too small house that needs renovation for 2 years and try and resell or rent it out?
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2023.06.01 23:33 godswheelchair How to convince dad to consider therapy?
My dad was diagnosed with stage 3B lung cancer in March, he recently finished up his 7 weeks of radiation and chemo, but they also discovered he needs peripheral bypass surgery on his right leg (that is scheduled for this Monday), and in the mean time since ending treatment and now, he is completely bored out of his mind and letting his emotions run rampant.
I know and have met his doctors, they would be quite pissed to discover he hasn’t been doing much except sitting around and moping. I get it, he’s incredibly lonely and impatiently waiting for this surgery so he could possibly get back into doing the things he enjoys doing, but I’ve recommended he find a good therapist and he hasn’t listened.
If I’m not working, my father wants everyone in the house to sit with him for hours on end in complete silence. This is not like him whatsoever. He used to play video games, enjoy watching a movie, doing little things around the house, now he has zero interest in anything, but wants everyone to sulk with him, and I’m seeing it starting to bother everyone else, tensions are rising since he’s not applying himself or listening to anyone’s advice. If it were up to him, I would be sitting with him from the moment he woke up to the moment he was ready for bed. And don’t get me wrong, I cherish my time with my father while he’s still around, but this isn’t healthy for him or anyone else, and this is not what his doctors want him doing.
Since he has limited mobility, we can’t go on walks or leave the house together very much. It’s extremely depressing when I look back to just a year ago and remembering my dad remodeling our bathroom, to now, nothing. And the thing is? He’s doing pretty well, his tumor shrunk about 60% and we’ll know more in August.
What can I do? I’m his daughter and I love him dearly, but he needs to understand that this isn’t okay and he’s not doing anything to make things better.
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2023.06.01 23:12 mtbor Management tools
I'm looking for reviews, comparisons, and experiences people have had with various apps and services designed to help people deal with ADHD and be more productive / improve their relationships and overall happiness when dealing with their ADHD.
I don't really know my type of ADHD but I have extreme problems with getting myself to finish large multistep projects, especially when it involves something that can be ruined. (Like the bathroom I'm remodeling and I can't seem to bring myself to cut the shower walls because I'm afraid I'll ruin the expensive shower kit).
I probably just need to see an ADHD counselor.... But is there anything any of you have had success with?
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2023.06.01 23:01 fairlyoddhippie Bathroom remodel HELP!
| We just moved into a new house and the bathroom is a nightmare. I’m guessing it was originally a half bath and the previous owners added a shower. Unfortunately they halfway covered the window and it just looks awful. They did a really bad diy job. What would you recommend doing to it? submitted by fairlyoddhippie to Renovations [link] [comments] |
2023.06.01 21:44 jbfirey Design software?
Planning on a full bathroom remodel on a condensed timeline. Contractor will help with picking out materials and available options but Is there a design software (preferably free) to help me decide on design elements such as built in shelving/cabinets so I can figure out what it might look like spatially to add these to the space?
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2023.06.01 20:22 Zykor27 Trauma Validation or Validation of Trauma?
So this is a weird crazy story/summary of life this far. I (28M) feel like I have been living my life with an absurd amount of masking. I set out on a spiritual awakening journey when I was 18 and started college, the first time I had ever been truly alone and truly started feeling that deep sense of loneliness. Which is what kicked in my spiritual awakening, by asking questions about who I was, why was I here and why did I have such a deep unexplainable yearning for "home" which was not "physically" attainable. Not a yearning for home in the sense of being with my family, but a deep, deep cry out from what I felt was my soul essence.
Fast forward through some heavy years of partying, clubbing/going to shows, drugs and alcohol. At 23, I met who is now my wife and the mother of my/our amazing daughter and through the 5 years we've been going through this human experience together, we both got a lot deeper and a lot more "serious" about expanding and opening up our spiritual bodies. We were kind of forced into delving DEEP into it because our first true "interactions/dates" were so deeply rooted in spirit that we (very fortunately) discovered/realized that we are cut off the same soul cloth and are infact soulmates/twin flames or whatever floats your boat for descriptions regarding life partners.
We have learned and discovered a lot about ourselves as well as a newly found perception of the outter world (largely influenced emotionally, spiritually, mentally by Ram Dass, Jack Kornfield, Dale RamDev. . . Spiritual Adepts/teachers, guides etc.) This absolutely transformed a lot of our inner and outer world (through disciplined routines and practices) for the better in a very beautiful way. Then in 2021 we moved to Idaho on an instinctual as well as an impulse decsion to be closer to my wife's side of the family out there, and our intuitive feeling of needing to go to the northwest part of the country. When we got there we were almost instantly met with extreme adversity and complications with my wife's health, our marriage, and life as a whole. So needless to say it was not the "change" we had in mind. Though we now see it all as the change/step that was necessary for self discovery and growth personally, together and as a while family unit. In late 2021 I was waiting for an orientation class for a new job and had to wait until the next class (2 weeks out) so while waiting two weeks, we needed money to eat and keep life running so I decided since I had a drill and basic tools I'd to do some side work/odd jobs (honey do list kind of things) to bring in whatever cash I could. This ended up blowing up in a beautiful way and I ended up quitting that new job on orientation day to set off and fully jump into the possible opportunity of working for myself. Now almost 2 years later and I'm still doing my own thing (bathroom remodels, tile, carpentry and flooring) and it's been amazing.
We also recently moved back home to Colorado and since we've been back it's been a struggle for a miriad of reasons, but the one struggle that I've found myself dealing with the most and is the heaviest emotion, is my own personal sense of validation. I actually just (today) realized that I have been chasing external validation for as long as I can remember (about 3-4 years old) While thinking about the current slump that I'm in I started thinking about what makes me "feel okay/feel like me" and most of those things are (now) related to my work. Building things for people, fixing things, repairs, custom furniture, etc. And then being validated by a "good job, we are so happy!" Kind of thing from my clients. Thinking further back before this and it's all been an ongoing search for validation through my external world. My party phase, the validation came from my knowledge of drugs, artists, previous party stories and a whole bunch of unhealthy methods and vices. Before that, through the beginnings of highschool getting into heavy drug use (psychedelics, weed and cocaine/stimulants) and partying I was a hardcore WoW gamer (big time raider in a progressive guild that sought to be the best in the game) and always sought out to be the best in my guild (for whatever role character I was playing). Seeking validation through being the best gamer. Before that I was obsessed with skateboarding, from age 9-16 or 17 I would strive to be the best skater in my school, at the skate park (within reason) and from my parents. I was small town sponsored (nothing really fancy, just discounted apparel/gear and occasionally a free board) And before that, but also mixed in through the years until about 20, I was huge on drawing mythical/fantasy creatures and characters and was pretty damn good. But looking back at all the "phase of interest transitions" I see one common goal. External validation through an attempt to prove myself in an outward expression/skill.
I was also looking back at the overall "emotional neglect" that I got from my parents (mom and step dad, bio dad left the picture when I was about 1, 1/2 ) And not to say that they were absolute assholes or anything like that, but they were very young (I was 2 and my mom was 18 when she met my step dad) and learning life for themselves. So I know that they didn't "intentionally" emotionally neglect me or invalidate me. But I wasn't good at the things they wanted me to do (playing tee ball/baseball as a toddleyoung kid) because my step dad was a huge baseball guy. And because I wasn't into or good at the things they wanted to see me do, I found my own interests, independently and amongst my friend group. However this caused parental tension because I was (in their eyes) becoming a hoodlum. Never got the acknowledgement or 'parental praise and proudness' from skating, drawing, playing WoW (step dad played too), obviously not for partying and doing drugs, but not even now. Not even as a 28 year old married man running my own business and father to a beautiful 3 year old daughter. Most of my side of the family disagrees with "entrepreneurship/self employment" because it isn't as "stable" as a corporate box job. - According to them, even though they've all been laid off at some point or another from corporations that are "never going anywhere, we have job security for life".
Sorry, tangent rants aside! I am now facing an immense amount of emotional pain/flashbacks for the lack of validation I have within myself. I am able to see and recognize the immense amount of growth I've undergone and the fact that I didn't die from drugs and partying and pushed through all of that to get where I am now. And I see that I have a shit ton to validate my own worth, I understand the growth that I've undergone and will continue to go through, but I absolutely struggle with giving myself credit, feeling okay with where I am. I can't help but feel like I'm not doing enough and always feel like there is something to do.
This morning I recognized that as an issue of control, and when I don't have the ability to control my volume/standard of output with "things to show" whether it be through work, hobby projects or anything else where I can do/build/repair something for someone. I get extremely depressed. And only really feel 'okay' when I'm doing things. I see this as a trauma wound that has deepend through my years and has gone essentially completely unacknowledged within myself. Until our TRUE spiritual journey began 5 years ago. I do not want to be mentally controlled or enslaved to the inner ego narrative that I'm not doing enough, but I have no idea how to truly accept myself. Accept who I was, who I am and who I'm becoming. I feel like I've just gotten so good at distracting myself by staying busy and constantly seeking validation through helping others that I have no idea who I actually am. I feel like I've been living the biggest lie ever and I've deceived everyone in my life but mostly myself. When I truly sit and think about what I truly enjoy for myself, I can't think of anything. Aside from the cliche of 'being with my family' (wife and daughter) which does truly bring me happiness. But I can't live in or hold on to "those moments" forever. And outside of them, or doing something for someone to give me that pat on the back, I do not have a damn clue who I am.
And I know that who I am is a culmination of everything I've done and am becoming. But that's still only validated through the external. And I know ram Dass would tell me to just let go and release the inner narrative to what is and just be in/of loving awareness. But, he too struggled with identity. Struggled with feeling like a phony and seeking external validation through experiences or services.
So if you made it this far, and have either evolved passed this state/level of emotional consciousness and awareness or you too are feeling the same. I'd love some tips, tricks suggestions or anything for how to help get through this obstacle of the human experience.
And because it was pretty long, and I jump around in here, if there's anything anyone wants further detail or clarification on, I'd be more than happy to attempt to fumble a rambling story again.
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Zykor27 to
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2023.06.01 19:45 jbfirey Design software?
We are doing a complete bathroom remodel on a condensed schedule and contractor wants us to pick out materials basically in real time. My question: I have a couple ideas in my head about what I want as part of this remodel including built in shelving, is there a good software (preferably free) I can use to help decide these elements and what they would look like spatially so I can communicate what I want to the contractor?
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jbfirey to
DesignMyRoom [link] [comments]
2023.06.01 18:53 azyoungblood Is it too much to ask contractors to show up when they say they will, or at least call if they’re not?
About 18 months ago I did a kitchen remodel, and while the results were ok, the process was awful. Poor communication from the contractor, they’d show up sporadically, sometimes wouldn’t see them for days. Very frustrating.
So when we moved on to the bathrooms, I interviewed contracts in detail, emphasizing how important communication is. Don’t keep us in the dark, do what you say you’re going to do, show up when you said you will.
We ended up selecting a much larger contractor this time, with nothing but good reviews everywhere we looked. Handed them a check, heard nothing for a month. Finally got through the design process after 3 months. Work was to start Tuesday morning. Got a call mid-day, they had an emergency at another job, installer will be late.
Ok, fine, I understand stuff happens.
Nobody showed up at all that day. No further communication.
Next morning I call them again, and was told the installer was on the way. Fine.
They got here, did the demo on the first bathroom. At the end of the day, they say they’ll be back with material between 8:30-9:30 today. Good deal.
It’s now 11:50, they’re not here, nobody has called.
Am I unreasonable in thinking someone should be calling me instead of the other way around? Or are the good contractors just so busy they don’t need to make an effort and I should be happy with whatever I get?
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azyoungblood to
HomeImprovement [link] [comments]